Home
by foxyroxystar
Summary: A oneshot songfic set to the song 'Home' by Michael Buble. Set after Date With the Night. Tommy's thoughts.


**Author's Note: **So this is my first fanfic. Constructive criticism is welcome and mostly enjoyed, my heart won't be crushed if you don't like it.

**Disclaimer:** Sadly I do not own Instant Star, or the song 'Home' by Michael Buble.

I think that's all so enjoy!

**Home**

****

Dark, mahogany doors burst open suddenly, startling the birds that were resting peacefully in the trees surrounding the back porch of the ranch style house into flight. A man flew through the doors and landed harshly on the rails that skirted the porch. He hit out at the wood, breathing deeply, before collapsing into a softly cushioned rocking chair and cradling his head in his hands. His brow was furrowed deeply with thoughts of anger, confusion, frustration and guilt. He longed for the one he knew could smooth away the creases from his forehead, lift him from his morose thoughts, with a single laugh or joke. Slowly, as memories of her consumed him, his breathing lightened and the ache in his head receded to a dull roar. He stood up gently and leaned against the rails, wondering as he did so who his girl was leaning on now.

Tommy sighed heavily, stretching his arms up and around, trying in vain to relieve the tension lying across his shoulders. He looked out across the acre of land attached to the house he was now staying in. The sun reflected off his icy blue eyes, no longer producing the sparkle that shone there so brightly only a month ago. Tommy turned as if to re-enter the house but instead reached behind the ancient rocking chair and pulled out his guitar. The corners of his mouth twitched upwards as he remembered all the times he had shared with Jude and this guitar. He sat down once more on the chair, hugging the instrument closer to him. It was the only source of comfort he had these days. He slowly strummed a tune, putting his heart and soul into it, hoping one day he could sing it for Jude.

_Another winter day  
Has come and gone away  
In Paris and Rome  
But I wanna go home  
Mmmmmmmm_

_Maybe surrounded by  
A million people I  
Still feel all alone  
I just wanna go home_

_Oh I miss you, you know_

_And I've been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you  
Each one a line or two  
"I'm fine baby, how are you?"  
Well I would send them but I know that it's just not enough  
My words were cold and flat  
And you deserve more than that _

He had listened to every one of the 112 voicemails she left him, his heart drenched with sadness as he heard the pain in her voice. He had lost track of the number of times he had picked up his phone, flicked it open, dialled her number, only to close it again. He had tried to write to her, but how could he say all that he had to on paper? The words never came out right and he always sounded like a cold, heartless jerk. Well that's what you are, he told himself. He would have to be a cold heartless jerk to leave her like he did, but the bald guy didn't give him much choice. Tommy's strong emotional voice wavered and threatened to break as he thought of how he had left her – no explanation, no reason, just a "I don't think I'll be coming back". He thought it would be easier to leave quickly, at that moment he was in too much pain to comprehend what this would do to her. He always hurt her, even when what he wanted most of all was to grab her and hold on to her so tightly that nothing could ever cause her pain again._  
_

_  
Let me go home  
I'm just too far from where you are  
I wanna come home_

And I feel just like I'm living someone else's life  
It's like I just stepped outside  
When everything was going right  
And I know just why you could not  
Come along with me  
That this is not your scene  
But you always believed in me

Tommy moaned almost desperately at the memory of the kiss they had shared in Darius's office. His eyes were shut tight as he savoured the memory of his lips melting into hers, his arms pushing their bodies closer.

Another winter day has come  
And gone away  
In even Paris and Rome  
And I wanna go home  
Let me go home

He could not believe that as soon as something more had started between them, it was all ripped away. He had to leave on the night of their first date, for God's sake!

And I'm surrounded by  
A million people I  
Still feel all alone  
Oh, let me go home  
Oh, I miss you, you know

Tommy wanted nothing more than to be with her now. Damn the complications, he thought, his resolve steeling. He needed to see Jude, to know she was okay, to explain things to her the way she deserved, even though he didn't understand it himself.

_  
Let me go home  
I've had my run  
Baby, I'm done  
I gotta go home  
Let me go home  
It will all be all right  
I'll be home tonight  
I'm coming back home_


End file.
